No, We Are Not Divorcing. But MAGA World Infected the Culture With an Absurd …

No, the Obamas Are Not Divorcing. But MAGA World Infected the Culture With an Absurd Rumor
And nope on the Jennifer Aniston part, too. Did we learn nothing about spreading gossip from the Kate Middleton conspiracy churn? Or Taylor Swift’s “wedding”?

In a May 8, 1796, letter to John Jay, George Washington wrote of his “serious anxiety” stemming from “misrepresentation,” which would “frequently flow and spread before they can be dissipated by the truth.” In other words, lies were rampant, and he was sick of this shit. Some 200 years later, another president can likely relate to the feeling, given persistent rumors that Jennifer Aniston is having a secret affair with former president Barack Obama, who, in another wild, specious, and unsupported blind item, is secretly separated from wife Michelle Obama.

A person with knowledge of the situation told Vanity Fair that these rumors are categorically untrue, and a source close to Aniston also characterized the affair rumors to VF as “beyond absurd.” There’s a conundrum for responsible journalists and exasperated subjects when trying to present the truth of a story like this one: If the people in question respond, they risk fueling the fire and stoking yet another leg of the news cycle. If they don’t respond and deny, then, well, they’re not denying a false report.

Before we get to the debunking, let’s trace the thread: This fanfic scenario first surfaced via an August cover story of the print edition of tabloid In Touch Weekly, claiming to expose “The Truth About Jen and Barack!” (A spokesperson for In Touch did not respond to Vanity Fair by press time.) The cover further claimed: “Michelle betrayed as Aniston steals her husband’s attention,” and helpfully added bullet points that read: “They’re obsessed with each other” and “Power circles in Washington and Hollywood can’t stop gossiping!” (It’s worth noting that In Touch is under the umbrella of A360 Media, formerly known as AMI, which came under fire for the catch-and-kill operation at the National Enquirer to protect Donald Trump’s reputation. A360 also recently published a special newsstand magazine—MAGAzine?—dedicated to singing Donald Trump’s praises.)

In October, Aniston appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live! and flatly denied the claim that she and the former president were having or had an affair.  “That is absolutely untrue,” she said. “There is no truth…. I’ve met him once,” Aniston said of the former president, adding, “I know Michelle more than him.”  She did joke that, “Of all the calls you get from your publicist where you’re like, Oh no, what’s it gonna be, or emails saying some cheesy tabloid is going to make up a story, and then it’s that. I was not mad at it.”  That answer might be different now that the peanut gallery is at it again, seeming to coincide with Michelle Obama’s absence at both President Jimmy Carter’s funeral and Donald Trump’s inauguration.

Thanks to accounts like Instagram gossip aggregator DeuxMoi, who includes an in-bio CYA disclaimer that “this account does not claim all information published is based in fact,” the scuttlebutt has persisted. On Tuesday, January 14, the account posted that “someone [DeuxMoi] trusts did text me that a week ago” in regards to the former first couple being separated, “but I don’t really know for sure.” The following Thursday, @deuxmoi published a new podcast episode and touched on both facets of the story. Of the separation rumor, Deux said: “I heard that they were separated from somebody I know, but I don’t know, I felt like it wasn’t viable. It was just the rumor mill churning.”

“I’ve been getting so many questions about it,” she said, not acknowledging that, you know, posting those not-saying-just-saying types of stories might be why people keep asking.  DeuxMoi did not respond to Vanity Fair’s request for comment.  Then we’ve got the garden-variety “body language experts” and the my-sister’s-catsitter’s-cousin’s-teacher’s-son “leaked DMs” shared by who-the-hell “influencers.” Listen, they don’t let just anyone use that siren emoji—it must be true. Wait, what’s that? They do let anyone use it? Oh.

One thing almost all the divorce doomsayers point to is Michelle’s whereabouts during recent presidential events.  Sure, maybe she skipped out on former president Jimmy Carter’s funeral and this month’s inauguration because she was trying to avoid a man, but consider that the man in question wasn’t Barack Obama, but Donald Trump. At the 2024 Democratic National Convention, Michelle delivered a stirring speech cautioning Americans to not “be our own worst enemies” and decrying Trump’s “petty” and “unpresidential” ways. “Why would we normalize that type of backward leadership?” she asked. “Doing so only demeans and cheapens our politics.” Is it surprising that she declined the chance to sit politely on that stage and pretend to be OK with a second Trump presidency?

At Carter’s funeral, by protocol, she would have been seated next to Trump. Even if she somehow avoided speaking to him, you just know this guy is a manspreader in addition to being a disinformation spreader.  Michelle Obama was on an extended vacation in Hawaii on the day of Carter’s funeral (she attended Carter’s late wife Rosalynn Carter’s funeral in November 2023 with the other four living first ladies) and chose to pay her respects in a statement. Her office confirmed ahead of the inauguration that she would not be attending, but they did not share a reason. She wasn’t physically present to hear the reinstated commander in chief declare: “I was saved by God to make America great again.”

Michelle Obama has said plainly and repeatedly that she “hates politics” and that she participates to the degree that she does out of a sense of duty and civic service. Perhaps she does not feel that lending herself to a public show of respect for Trump is part of any civic duty. (Plus, Trump and his wife didn’t attend Joe Biden’s presidential inauguration.)

Let’s also look back to recent history. Just a year ago, when it was announced that Kate Middleton would be taking a break from public engagements following an abdominal surgery, dark rumors swirled, and the online discourse flowed with shocking, unfounded, and literally unbelievable speculation as to the circumstances. In March 2024, when Kate shared that she was battling cancer and begged for privacy for her family, those who had been speculating with giddy abandon were suddenly having a lot less fun. Taylor Swift, too, has been the subject of painful press speculation about her personal life: In November 2023, DeuxMoi repeatedly republished claims that Swift and ex-boyfriend Joe Alwyn secretly had a non-legal wedding ceremony. The account was so adamant as to say it would “die on this hill! Put it on my tombstone!” In response, Swift’s publicist, Tree Paine, spoke out publicly in a rare move.

“Enough is enough with these fabricated lies about Taylor from Deuxmoi,” Paine wrote on her social media. “There was NEVER a marriage or ceremony of ANY kind. This is an insane thing to post. It’s time for you to be held accountable for the pain and trauma you cause with posts like these.”  And yet, the sensational rumor mill still churns on, just with different names in the headlines this time.

It’s unsurprising to learn the political alignment of some of those most audibly screeching that the Obamas are dunzo and that the Friends star is more than a friend. Case in point: Jessica Reed Kraus, the vehemently pro-Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Instagrammer by the handle @houseinhabit, who’s shown rabid support of Kennedy and Trump (though she spent the evening of Donald Trump’s Election Day victory festivities barefoot on the floor outside the party because she couldn’t swing an invite).

Kraus posted on Friday, January 24, on her Instagram that she heard months ago that the Obamas were destined for divorce, but is talking about it now because “usually there is some weight to rumors when they refuse to die.” What about when MAGA Instagrammers repeatedly ignore the DNR on said rumor? What weight does that carry? “For now, it’s all whispers,” Kraus wrote in a newsletter she dedicated to amplifying the story a few days prior. “But the whispers are getting louder.”

Kraus might also be one of the “very serious journalists” sources that Meghan McCain cited while talking to Puck’s Tara Palmieri and voicing her own opinions about the state of their union. And on January 23, Megyn Kelly read verbatim from Kraus’s newsletter on her SiriusXM show and called the situation a “political earthquake in Democrat circles.”

The whole thing carries more than a whiff of desperation from the right, so insistent on manufacturing conspiracy theories about a beloved Democratic couple while (don’t look now! Keep chatting about the personal lives of these married people you don’t actually know!) their own guy systematically dismantles democracy. This particular fable smacks of what Michelle referred to as Trump’s “same old con” at the DNC: “Doubling down on ugly, misogynistic, racist lies as a substitute for real ideas and solutions that will actually make people’s lives better.”